How is Cal's experience living within two genders similar to the immigrant experience of living within two cultures? How is it different?

Cal is constantly torn in two. She has known for a long time that she is very different from other kids, but yet she holds it inside, keeping it a secret that she alone is left to bear.

As an immigrant, I am sure at times you feel lonely as well, and feel isolated from those around you. You strive so hard to hold on to your own culture without giving up your previous identity altogether.

Cal at the end has to choose to give up her identity just as an immigrant would do. However, Cal's change was abrupt and decisive while an immigrant probably has more opportunities to ease into the changes at their own pace.

For both an immigrant and for Cal, there is one leg in the door of one life and perhaps only a finger in the door for the other, and eventually your whole body needs to go through in order to be at peace with yourself.

I think either situation would be hard, but I feel especially for Cal as hers is a road that mostly has to be travelled alone. All of her friends and family had to be cast aside for a spell in order for her to find herself. Desdemona and Lefty at least have each other for the transition and they are able to collect more family along the way.

Actually, it seems as though Cal is the only family member who has to completely leave her family in order to discover her identity. The other members of her family seem to be unable to branch out, even when looking for their life partners in marriage.

MIDDLESEX: Book 4, Question 5: Why does Cal decide to live as a man rather than as a woman?

Before I attempt to answer this question, I would just like to state that I thought this was quite a challenging and provoking novel. To understand it fully, I should probably read the book several more times. This is not a genre I would normally choose on my own, but that is what a book club is about, isn't it? Thanks, Anne, for your choice this time, and for giving us an extra month to be consumed with this plot!

I was surprised, very surprised, when Callie read Dr. Luce's report of his findings and recommendations and he stated he knew the chromosomes XY indicated Callie was a male, yet he recommended the transition surgery to become a female. As Callie had gone along with so many experiences previously (the rape by her brother's friend, her mother's attempts to teach her to be a true girl with dress and role-following), I truly expected Callie to have the suggested surgery. My surprise came when Callie wrote the note to her parents, Tessie and Milton, that she was running away and staying a male. I was glad she was FINALLY being truthful with herself/himself.

Truthfulness was the HUGE issue in this novel: it started out from the very beginning with Desdemona and Lefty's deception of their marriage legality. When Callie was lying about her sexual preferences as a female, it almost got her "cut off" from the gender she was born with. Hence, she was following the family tradition of lying, not only to herself, but to the world at large. And she was only 14 at the time of this Dr. consultation, and one very confused person at that.

Why did Callie decide to become Cal? I think it is that the truth finally sunk in, and it was time to face it. The lies, the deception, the glossing over what is real and true is over. She/he needed to be true to herself/himself even though it would have lifetime ramifications and difficulties, especially when wanting a relationship with a life partner. I think the right decision was made.